User talk:NukaColaMan
Welcome NukaColaMan (talk) 18:25, July 15, 2015 (UTC) Spam Pages A page you have recently created has been deleted because it was considered spam. In addition to having the page deleted, you have been awarded an automatic 3-day ban from editing. The next time you post a spam page, you will be banned for a week. In the future, contribute quality content. If you really must post a Horrible Troll Pasta, add it to and not here. LOLSKELETONS Talk • 12:26, April 16, 2013 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 21:22, July 15, 2015 (UTC) Re: story And I'll respond in the manner I always do (even when someone is being pointlessly childish/passive-aggressive). Your story was not up to quality standards it was poorly edited, had numerous punctuation, capitalization, and wording issues. Starting with the basics, a typical paragraph is five to ten sentences. Too many and it becomes a pain to read and blocky. (Paragraphs 2, 3,, 4, and 6 for example.) You also have multiple people speaking in the same paragraph which makes it difficult to follow who is saying what and to who. I would suggest picking up a novel or reading how other stories lay out dialogue. Punctuation issues: Commas missing where needed. Try reading your story aloud and see where pauses come naturally to catch a majority of the areas where they were left out. "...now that high school was over(,) I didn't have to travel across town to compete.", "One morning over the Summer(,) I read over the newspaper and the disappearances made a side story on the front page.", "Well Davis(comma missing) if you were fuckin' paying attention to my story", "I laughed and after the comedic moment passed(punctuation missing) I changed my expression to that of foreboding and mentioned how I saw a ghastly bus, stopped momentarily at the station on Curtner.", etc. Words directly impacting each other should be hyphenated: "bone chilling", "spine-tingling", etc. Punctuation missing from dialogue: "Perhaps it's more than an urban legend(punctuation missing)" I said", ""What the fuck(comma/punctuation missing)",", etc. Wording issues: "Henry was first to begin, he stated that my house was haunted, which we all agreed upon based upon (redundant) our own experiences, how he keeps (kept) seeing a black figure lurk the shadows, and (we) added our own accounts to support his story." Your story also has a lot of run-on sentences that should have been broken into two or three sentences to make the story flow properly. Capitalization issues: "...Mick," Said (said) Ryan.", "Well," He (he) began, "Speaking (speaking) of buses," (as the sentence carries over through the story), etc. Story issues: your story is very generic and the concept of a bus that spirits people away has been done multiple times. (On the Bus, The Idle Bus on 5th Avenue, to name a few). Quoted material needs to be in quotations "Last seen on the corner of S. West St. and King Road read one newspaper, Last known location around McLaughlin and Story'' said the description on an AMBER alert.", "First disappearance was 16 year old *** of parents *** and ***" Putting them in italics doesn't differentiate the lines from the rest of the story and can cause confusion when used in conjunction with thoughts as is what you do next. "Typical, I thought. Probably running away from home.", "me, the disappearances.", etc. The thoughts should be in quotations as it is a form of dialogue (and most also italicize it too to separate it from spoken dialogue) Combine that with the rampant punctuation, capitalization, wording, formatting/story issues and you have a story not up to quality standards. As for why we don't have a more descriptive deletion message, it's because we delete stories for a variety of reasons and if we outline them all, the message would be pages long. We do this because, as you said yourself, "who wants to read a poorly edited story, right?" so instead of writing pithy messages, you can use that time to proof-read your story and take it to the writer's workshop for feedback. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 22:16, July 15, 2015 (UTC) Story deletion Your story has been deleted because it doesn't meet the wiki's quality standards. If you feel that it did meet the standards, please state your case on Deletion Appeal. Make sure you follow the instructions to the letter there, or your appeal will be automatically denied. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO REUPLOAD YOUR PASTA. If you upload it again, you'll receive a 1-day ban from editing, as per the rules. Read the Deletion FAQ for details on the 'what' and 'why' of the deletions we make. Read this guide and these blog posts for further details on how you can improve your story/stories to make them meet our quality standards. For additional help, submit your story to the Writer's Workshop for feedback. | creepypasta.wikia.com | I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! | [[User:Underscorre|'Under']][[User talk:Underscorre|'Scorre']] }} 10:35, January 2, 2016 (UTC) :Here is a copy of the story Underscorre deleted. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 06:42, January 8, 2016 (UTC) ::No prob. Just remember the deletion message above. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 06:47, January 8, 2016 (UTC)